I was the angry environmentalist, riding my bike through the city flipping off people in giant vehicles. Ford Excursions and Hummers in particular. I loved the earth so much that I hated the people on its behalf, myself included. I believed my belief should be strong enough to change everything, and I believed hard, constantly disappointed. My muscles were rope tight and I thought they were supposed to be. I thought my flexed face should be convincing.
A few times I talked directly to someone I thought needed changing and that person would change me instead. And a lot of other things happened.
I'm still an environmentalist, if I have to label myself based on something I care about. I'm angry when I get angry but I don't feel identified by anger anymore. I just get honestly angry in the moment and don't reject myself for it. This has been a huge change, to not be trapped by anger. It's normal and healthy to feel anger when it comes up. It's not normal or healthy to repress it and judge it and puritanically sterilize our feelings.
Biodynamic awareness, this work has been a life changer - life giver! We are all, in this culture, taught to "control ourselves", which is fundamentally impossible and misses the point of living. We were taught to deny ourselves, create ourselves in someone else's image, and that has created little monsters of us in general. If we can't be emotionally honest, then we cannot be mentally honest. It's all one system either in agreement with reality or not. The division within us is reflected in the division among us.
The environment vs economy culture war is a mirror on what we've been doing inside ourselves. Never ending battle. So what I'm saying about anger is, just be honest in yourself. If you're angry, you're angry. Look around and see what's happening and needs your attention. Pure anger is wisdom energy to use and gives us focus. But if we suppress it, it burns us and we burning up the world, and then we get mad because we're burning up the world... Talk about unsustainability. What's the anticdote? Let's find out.
Hi, it's Ginger. I hope my thoughts here will add to freedom, expansion and creativity for you as you read them.